discovering self discovery
today i didnt really intend on writing a post .... but wat the hell i am writing this one ..... i know i am going to regret this one .... and i guess i know why( probably delete it in some days when i am over this swing of mine ) got on to write this one after i went through something on the net (hi5.ccom) ...read a comment on somebodys profile ( wont tell u who it was..... i guess i don wanna say it to myself :-( .......... don really know how to put this into words or give this feeling a definate shape ....... all i know is ,want it to come out of me ..... may be thats why i ll use my eyes and nobodys shoulder after posting this.i imagine , i wonder why no she didnt mean iti am living a lie no i would have loved her anywaysit wouldnt have been the same had i met her now she has been a friend all throughbut she gave me most of my lows i guess thats what friends are fori can think for myself she did "everything" for me how can i forget she refused to acknowledge my self respect she bought me back to the ground!
har kal phir ayega "kal".....its one magical word all of us use everyday, sometimes without realising how beautiful it is !we don realise how this word is the essence of our existence.....how it bridges the gap between `yesterday n tomorrow`. it is an assurance.... if we didn achieve our goals today , there is always going to be a tomorrow. it also lessens the weight of our goals and dreams, not letting it turn into a burden .... coz some responsibilities can be put on the shoulders of tomorrow, if there is some incomplete work it isnt going remain so for ever coz there is tomorrow!every tomorrow is going to be a yesterday and every yesterday was a tomorrow . how this word "kal "places both tomorrow and yesterday on an equal footing by using the same word to define both . our past lays down the framework for our future and how this past and every past also has a past of its own . this word in itself is so incomplete which makes it perfect, coz we know between every yesterday n tomorrow there stands a today which can change the course of history . hope is what makes us survive no matter what we go through . if our yesterday hasnt been beautiful there is always a wait for a beautiful tomorrow which is what we strive for ,and when we do get near it we know how to value it . on the other hand if our past has been wonderful we want our tomorrow to be even better, our yesterday becomes the stepping stone for an ideal tomorrow . if this wonderful yesterday doesnt exist anymore and turns into a today full of trials then there is one thing we know for sure , life isnt full of sorrows and the beautiful yesterday is going manifest itself into an amazing tomorrow... no matter what we face today!
make ur pick is there anything called choices are any available to me are we ever given a chance are the dilemmas true i feel what we are is really, what we do! when he says "make your pick" the pick is already made coz what we end up picking makes us what we are!
this is just so wierd ..... you find the most wanted things in life {i guess they are wanted as they completely change the way u look at things } just at the most unwanted places{ sorry ... but i guess they r unwanted in your life ... atleast thats what u think } . the other day when i was just flipping through a paper, basically a dentistry journal... i know my friends are so not gonna believe this coz anybody who knows me would know that i would never flip through something like that { i m assuming that my friends know me ... actually they do... more than i know myself} anyways getting back to what i was sayin or atleast trying to say .... so just flippin pages and not grasping a single word... thats wat i was doin, suddenly my eyes fell on this beautiful little quote by i don who... it would be rather unfair to call it just "beautiful" coz beauty is a fantasy and very relative { though i still don know what bernard williams is tryin to say about ethical relativism} ... so let me call it "just so true " !!!!! so this is wat the quote was " God loved the birds , thats how the trees came into being ... and men loved the birds too , thats how cages came into being"...{ i m sure this wasnt the way it was put down ... so please forgive me for not remembering the exact words} ... i don how and why, but this did change a" little part of me" and thats how i guess it changed me ....coz every little part of u is what makes u "u"!!!god loves me thats what i know thats why he made me ,to show all the love, i know i love myself thats also what i know but i made myself, to show all that love , i know..... i don know whether these lines actually capture the essence of the quote but thats exactly what i felt when i read it for the first time .... coz it is wierd how we cage ourseleves within us to show to the world the"self" which we may not be.......